Marriage Advice No. 3

Married life is an extreme roller coaster ride. Once you entered this sacred vow, you have to get ready to experience the highs and lows in your relationship as lifetime partners.

There will be days that your lows are your fights, that at that very moment felt like you need to end your relationship now.

Perhaps, you have never felt that surrender before and this time you have reached your limit. Thinking it's better to end things now than to continue emotionally hurting  eachother because for sure, this situation will repeat in the future and there will be more at stake by then. By ending your relationship now, you are saving the both of you a more drastic break-up. 

Perhaps, that is where most relationship ends. At that kind of low. Because, yes, it is more ideal to save both of you than to continually be hurt by staying in the relationship. 

But also, that is where you'll know you have married the right person. Because he/she will stay. He/She will cry and burst put all his/her unsaid hurt feelings but at the end he/she stays.

And perhaps, you can try to push more his/her limit and patience with you because you really wanted to save the both of you from further hurting eachother by bidding goodbye now. But this person will always choose to stay.

He/she kept fighting for your relationship. Because perhaps, he/she knows that a married life is an extreme roller coaster ride and this is just part of the lows because surely the highs will follow. And he/she has chosen you through thick and thin. It's you he/she wants to spend this extreme roller coaster ride with. It's only you.

When you have realized this truth, you gotta stop pushing him/her away in exchange of saving the both of you. What you should do is stay too. And hug this eternity you two have created for the life you have envisioned. You gotta fight to keep this too, not to tear it apart. Help your partner who wants the both of you get through this low. 

Not everyone is blessed to have that kind of partner. And you got to realize that now and not after you have let him/her go. You have found your gem and now you got to decide and commit to fight for your relationship to last whatever happens. Like how he/she does.

You got to realize now that you have not mistaken of choosing him/her, God did really send him/her to be your lifetime partner. You have to realized it now. Not after you have decided to let him/her go. Yes, I am being redundant because this needs to sink in. 

There are lows, but there are highs too. And after you got through this kind of low, the burden or threat of it repeating subsides.

Also, keep including your relationship in your prayers. You would not survive without God being at the center of your relationship.

Shalom to you and your lifetime partner! 🫰

Disclaimer: The fight I meant here is a fight not involving physical attack or abuse nor emotional manipulation. If that's the case, leave and never look back.

Marriage Advice No. 2

I wrote our first advice last year, and just now comes the second. And again, I reiterate, that we are no expert, we are just sharing insights from what we are learning as married couple to maybe somehow help other couples too.

In any romantic relationship, love is important, but so is, respect, forgiveness, trust, faithfulness, understanding, patience, and the list goes on. Your relationship will not survive a lifetime if it is only anchored on love and love alone. It needs to be anchored on the list I've mentioned (and what I've said the list goes on). But most importantly, first, your relationship needs to have a deeper and strong foundation, and that is God. And those aspects will naturally be born as you go on with your relationship. 

And sometimes, in order to give your lifetime partner the respect, faithfulness, understanding he deserves you need to let go of things that makes him feel otherwise. That includes cutting ties or attachment that he doesn't approve of. I have to admit that I don't understand this at first. We argue over this thinking he doesn't widen his mind and see from my perspective. I have seen him as someone who lacks faith in my love for him whenever this issue arises. I actually made steps to make him build the same attachment I have with this person. And I thought for awhile it worked. It was only when I saw and felt my man's pain brought by the attachment I have with this friend, I realized that I am not becoming of a wife he deserves. I am hurting him. And I am choosing to hurt him with having this attachment he doesn't approve of. And I don't like hurting him. It hurts me too. And so, I cut the ties with my long time friend.  

Don't get the idea that this post is about me cheating. No. I would never hurt him like that. The attachment I am talking about is a long time friendship with an opposite sex. Do I love him?Yes, but I only love him as a friend. That's for certain. There are only few things I am certain about, and that's one of it. We've known eachother since High School, and he is one of the few people who stayed all through my life's seasons. That's why I don't understand why I have to cut our ties. Our friendship is that deep already, deep but not in a romantic way. That is maybe why it's hard to let go. I thought it could exist side by side with our married life. But I have married my man whom I vow to keep on choosing everyday over someone. And if it hurts him, I don't want it. 

So to that friend, If you're reading this... This is the answer to why I suddenly stop communicating with you. You always told me your girl is not bothered with our relationship, but my man is. I told you once that before, and you being friend with him didn't work. I will still be your friend and will always be your Basyang but let me be just a friend from a distance, supporting you quietly. I can no longer be by your side with all the activities we share interest with,  am sure your girl will do that with you. Continue living happy. 

And to you, my Man, I love you. I respect you. I understand you. I will be faithful to you for the rest of my life. And just like my vow, I will always choose you. I would turn my back to whatever is hurting you. Which made me realize, that If I were in your position, I would definitely feel jealous too and might do something unpleasant with you and your girl friend. But you always turn your back to whatever hurts me. Indeed, I  blessed having you. Thank you for being so patient with me. I love you everyday, always.  

And that my dearest readers, is our marriage advice for this season. Look forward for more. 

Remarkable Scene: 1899 Series

There were only two remarkable scenes for me: One is this one which made me laugh out loud and didn't quite expect the series to have a scene like this because of its genre:

The second one is these, consider them as one since I've combined them all here in one single clip. All the scenes where Daniel and Maura are together unfolding their story:

I am not into making these kind of clips but since I noticed that there were only few clips about them, here I am making one to satisfy the search result of folks like me who ended up liking the series very much. And yes, the series is a lot more bigger than Daniel and Maura's story. But their's is my favorite. And the song suit them well: Kahit isang saglit by Hulyo.

Meanwhile, here's an additional clip I found on youtube that kind of stirring up some emotions as well:

I'm sorry it took me long to make a stand with you, Johnny Depp

 Uh-uh, not my Johnny. 

I didn't know the man personally. I am just a fan who adores him from a distance. I don't know anything about their relationship nor how and what really went wrong. But I know, that they both have lapses, it's not just Amber.

For a girl to act like that, his partner perhaps fell short of the girl's definition of love and relationship. Perhaps Johnny had failed her somewhere on the line. But to treat your partner like that doesn't justify it. It doesn't give you the right to be abusive of your partner just because he always fall short of your expectations. And to devise evil against him is a big no-no. You don't do that to the person you love. You just can't.

It makes me wonder if she really had loved Johnny. 

It's a good thing the truth are all coming out. I adore Johnny, but it is only now I took a stand with him, now that the evidences of violence to him has been given. Because I thought it's not right for me to make "sawsaw" on their private relationship I know nothing about.. 

But now it's clear that this isn't about making "sawsaw" on their private relationship anymore, nor standing up with Johnny because you're a die-hard fan. It's speaking up against domestic violence. And we should fight against it and make a stand. Domestic violence should have no place in any homes. Regardless of the gender, no one should be a victim of it.

And, yes, not my Johnny. You don't do that to my Johnny. 

Sincerely Mainit-ang-ulo-kay-Amber,

One of Johnny Depp's number 1 fans.

(Yes, madami kaming nagkeclaim na number 1 fan niya)

Dalawang Sentimos ko sa Hindi Na Nga ng This Band

Kaya siguro dumadami ang broken family, broken relationship kasi mas nasesensationalized yung ganitong klaseng anggulo ng love story.

Huwag mong boyprinen o girlprinen o pakasalan kung based lang sa nadadama mong "love" ngayon ang dahilan. Instead, alisin mo yung "love" na 'yan na nadarama mo at tanungin mo ang sarili mo kung pipiliin mo pa din ba siya anuman ang mangyari?

Truth be told, kabataan, we will fell out of love 'dun sa taong sinasabi mong mahal mo, but we can fall in love again if you work things out. It's a cycle: love, courtship, marriage, and you must both remain committed and faithful. Cycle sa same person you're in a relationship. Hindi 'yung kapag 'di ka na kinikilig, 'di mo na mahal, 'di ka na naarouse, iiwan mo na, iba naman. Kaya nga may kasabihan sa mag-asawa na dapat araw-araw magligawan kasi the spark will naturally disappear if not ignited.

Kaya kung hindi naman siya yung nakikita mong kaya mong panindigan kahit 'di na siya kamahal-mahal. 'Wag mo na jowain. 'Yun lang, nainis lang ako sa nampoprovoked na kanta pero, 'di ko sinasabing 'di maganda 'yung kanta nila.

Nakalimutan Ko Nang Kalimutan Ka (Favorite Scenes)

Took me quite a while to watch again a comedy film and I wasn't disappointed of this one. I was really laughing hard while watching the scenes below. They were so funny that I have decided to have a copy of them.

Go on and play the clips below. 😅

P.S. I didn't like the ending though. 

Battling Anxiety and Depression: You are not Alone

I never knew what depression and anxieties are until it hit me and experienced it myself. Thank God, He helped me go through it.

The first thing you should do when you are in this situation is to accept the fact that you're in that state of mind: anxious and depress. Otherwise, you wouldnt't be able to get out of it.

Second, don't pretend that you are tough and not needing the help of others. Don't build walls around you. Don't indulge yourself in the thought that no one will understand what you are going through. It is a lie that the enemy is instilling in your mind for you to lose this battle. Seek help from God and He will give you the right persons to also help you go through it. Be open to your family. Never ever doubt them. Ask for prayers. Listen to what God is saying to you. In this world, you will only recognize the voice and leading of God if you have a relationship with Him. Have a relationship with Jesus and the rest will follow. It won't be easy but you will be victorious with your relationship with Him. Be vulnerable to Him and trust Him.

Third, do the things that awaken the motivation in you. In my case, reconnecting with the nature plays a big part of it (although I am doing it quite some time before). It helped me remember how awesome and sovereign God is. It makes me remember how faithful God is in my life. It refreshes my whole being. Also, it makes me write and if you are following my blogs, you know for sure that writing is my passion. Reconnecting with the nature makes me create and produce a passion; a passion which was placed by God in my heart from the very beginning.

Fourth, use your situation to inspire and help others who go through the same situation. Like what I am doing now -- sharing this story. You went through it for a reason. And that reason will be revealed by God. But be careful, remember that what you went through wasn't about you. You should proclaim the goodness and works of God. Don't put yourself ahead of Him. Don't be decieved.

Fifth, say 'thank you' to all the persons God sent during your battle. Appreciate them. Family or friends. They are the truest of all the persons you have in your life.

Sixth, forgive those who have hurt you or caused you to suffer depression and anxiety. It doesn't matter if they ask for it or not. They may not know what they have caused you. Still, forgive. Release your forgiveness. And again, it is only possible when you have a relationship with Jesus. Because having a relationship with Jesus is also knowing Him intimately day by day, and you will know how big His heart is when it comes to forgiveness.

Seventh, and probably last, remember this passage from the Bible where Jesus said: Take heed and be of good courage, I have overcome the world. I forgot the verse but you can search it on google to double check. :D

Now to end this blog, here's some photos to lighten up your mood. These are proofs how sovereign God is. The world is His canvass, witness and feel.

-end-

Rewrite The Stars (Kober-Koberan)

Ang panget. Pero blog ko 'to, e. Upload ko trip ko.

Mas tunay, mas masakit.

Remarkable Scene: Cardboard Boxer

LAHAT

If you do not understand the word above, please use Google Translate: Filipino to English. Salamat! :D

But let me put the scene where I cried myself out loud, or in our word "ngal-ngal"... but still, I managed to "ngal-ngal"  quietly. :P

Also, the film itself (including the story, script, cinematography, actors, background music, and everything that completes the film) is remarkable or probably beyond. Watch it to further understand what I'm talking about.

P.S. I was actually looking for a film to watch then delete right after the end. But this one is staying. :D

Remarkable Scene: Stuck In Love

I have no idea what this film is all bout. I just saw one of its scenes on twitter and then decided to download the film and probably watch it someday.

And that someday happens to be an hour later. And it is one of the awesome films I've watched. I'm glad I am following a page on twitter, which features scenes from wonderful movies. :D

I was kinda laughing when I learned that this film is about a family of writers struggling in their own personal life as writers and as a human. I can relate to some of the scenes and characters of this film. And below were those I considered remarkable in this film:

1.

Daughter: You're a well respected novelist. You won a &*^*&^((&&** twice. You can't behave like that.
Dad: She's coming back.
Daughter: At least tell me you've been writing.
Dad: (unable to answer)
Daughter: Look what you've let her do to you Dad! Seriously!

2.

Brother: You've never been in love?
Sister: If love is setting up a table for a person who's never coming home. I think I'll pass.

3.

Dad: A writer is a sum of their experiences. Go get some.

4.

(in front of aspiring writers)

Dad: The reason why Leslie could never get me up here to talk about the process of writing is... I'm not sure of what to say about that could benefit you. And I still find it all very mysterious years after I wrote my first book. And I'm not sure what it is that compels a person to continue to play make believe even after they're an adult. 

5.

Husband: Here's a confession: I'm not a great writer. I'm a great re-writer. I haven't written anything since you left. 

Ex-wife: You are a great writer. Don't waste all your imaginations on me.

And I have to admit that (again -_-) this film made me cry but I'm not going to tell you which part. You have to experience it yourself. :D

Remarkable Part: Traveler of the Century by Andres Neuman

(warning: spoiler alert)

I've been reading this book for several months and just two weeks ago, finally, I have read its last sentence. 

This was actually the first time I've seen this kind of format when it comes to narrative novel and I got confused on the first few pages of this book -- making me read a sentence twice or thrice in order to understand who's speaking the lines. But as I continue reading, I got used to it. 

There are scenarios that bore me, like those parts when the characters are having discussions about philosophers, wirters, of which I have no idea if they exist in real life. And maybe that's the reason why it took me several months to finish the book. 

But there are lots of interesting part, I must say. And there are, of course, remarkable parts (for me). And below are they:

1.

I just wonder why Neuman should be so heartless in this part -- instead of letting the butterfly free, he killed it rather. I guess, I don't know, maybe sometimes no matter how good your intentions are you will only end up hurting someone or maybe we should not intervene with the law of nature. Anyway, whatever is the reason behind this part, this made me feel sad. I mean, for me, Sophie is right, man!

2.

This is remarkable, well, because I find it funny. 😂 

3.

I cried for Rudi while reading his words.  No one deserves betrayal. No one deserves to be let down by people they love. No one. 

4.

(Reread the description at no. 3)

5.

The tautology part. That literally made me LOL.

It goes something like this:

"We realized that we're looking for a man who is unhappy of his baldness."

"What a stupid tautology! What kind of man is happy with his baldness?"

😂😂😂

6.

You could have prevented this, Hans. But, you didn't. 

There you go.  I hope this post gives you interest to read this book. Although, I must say, I don't quite like the ending. 😁

Remarkable Scene: Little Miss Sunshine

I was following a page in twitter (I don't know if 'page' is the term, but I know almost everybody has Facebook so probably you'll get what I mean ;P) which features movie lines and quotes. And then,  one of their posts caught my attention or probably moved me in some ways. So, I look at the description to see the title of the movie and it says, "Little Miss Sunshine". I immediately, watched its trailer and then decided to download the whole film.

I was not expecting too much from the film, but then as the movie began playing, I was literally hooked on it already.

Here are some of the remarkable scenes that are worth sharing because they remind us of the reality of life and the lessons to get through it. It gave me the idea that it's alright if reality beaten and bitten you hard; 'life's a bitch' that's what they say and you gotta be bitchier than it together with your family or friend and don't forget God, please. :D

These scenes below were not in chronological order though.


1. Dad talking to his son who just failed a business deal. What made it heartwarming was connected to their personality. So, find out what personalities they have. :P You will have a hint as you continue to read this blog. :D

2. Of course, everyone of us needs to be reminded of this.

3. Yeah, it is remarkable because I can relate to the old man. :p 

4. This is what apathy looks like. -_-

5. You'll find out why I considered this remarkable when you watch the film. The first line was from the Mom.

6. Reality bites, indeed.

7. Don't listen to the standard of media when it comes to beauty. ;)

8. We all been here.

9. Because sufferings mold, shape and make a better version of us.

Now the list below were the remarkable scenes that made me cry. Literally cried the hell out of me.

1. Yes, that very moment.

2. (T.T) (T.T) (T.T)....

3. Mother knows best. :)

4. You'll know why it's part of this list when you watch the film. :p

So, there you go. I hope I didn't spoil the movie for you. ;P