Marriage Advice No. 2

I wrote our first advice last year, and just now comes the second. And again, I reiterate, that we are no expert, we are just sharing insights from what we are learning as married couple to maybe somehow help other couples too.

In any romantic relationship, love is important, but so is, respect, forgiveness, trust, faithfulness, understanding, patience, and the list goes on. Your relationship will not survive a lifetime if it is only anchored on love and love alone. It needs to be anchored on the list I've mentioned (and what I've said the list goes on). But most importantly, first, your relationship needs to have a deeper and strong foundation, and that is God. And those aspects will naturally be born as you go on with your relationship. 

And sometimes, in order to give your lifetime partner the respect, faithfulness, understanding he deserves you need to let go of things that makes him feel otherwise. That includes cutting ties or attachment that he doesn't approve of. I have to admit that I don't understand this at first. We argue over this thinking he doesn't widen his mind and see from my perspective. I have seen him as someone who lacks faith in my love for him whenever this issue arises. I actually made steps to make him build the same attachment I have with this person. And I thought for awhile it worked. It was only when I saw and felt my man's pain brought by the attachment I have with this friend, I realized that I am not becoming of a wife he deserves. I am hurting him. And I am choosing to hurt him with having this attachment he doesn't approve of. And I don't like hurting him. It hurts me too. And so, I cut the ties with my long time friend.  

Don't get the idea that this post is about me cheating. No. I would never hurt him like that. The attachment I am talking about is a long time friendship with an opposite sex. Do I love him?Yes, but I only love him as a friend. That's for certain. There are only few things I am certain about, and that's one of it. We've known eachother since High School, and he is one of the few people who stayed all through my life's seasons. That's why I don't understand why I have to cut our ties. Our friendship is that deep already, deep but not in a romantic way. That is maybe why it's hard to let go. I thought it could exist side by side with our married life. But I have married my man whom I vow to keep on choosing everyday over someone. And if it hurts him, I don't want it. 

So to that friend, If you're reading this... This is the answer to why I suddenly stop communicating with you. You always told me your girl is not bothered with our relationship, but my man is. I told you once that before, and you being friend with him didn't work. I will still be your friend and will always be your Basyang but let me be just a friend from a distance, supporting you quietly. I can no longer be by your side with all the activities we share interest with,  am sure your girl will do that with you. Continue living happy. 

And to you, my Man, I love you. I respect you. I understand you. I will be faithful to you for the rest of my life. And just like my vow, I will always choose you. I would turn my back to whatever is hurting you. Which made me realize, that If I were in your position, I would definitely feel jealous too and might do something unpleasant with you and your girl friend. But you always turn your back to whatever hurts me. Indeed, I  blessed having you. Thank you for being so patient with me. I love you everyday, always.  

And that my dearest readers, is our marriage advice for this season. Look forward for more. 

Enchanted to meet Mama

 

Marriage Advice No. 1

I turned off the faucet, as I can't hear clearly the speaking voice behind the bathroom door. "Ha?", I said. "Alam ko na 'yung sinasabi mong clone. Siya 'yung Tatay ni Rey. Magiging scavenger sila. Blah blah." "Anak ng clone si Rey?" I said, but actually I was pertaining to the other clone, Fin. I did not correct him. We were talking about these before I enter the bathroom to take a bath. 

Months ago, I started to entice him to watch this amazing saga. "Panuorin mo 'yun. Maganda istorya nu'n" I told him. And just days ago, he surprised me, "Maganda 'tong movie. Ayaw mo panuorin." and then, seeing Rogue One playing on the screen.

I watched it again with him. All of the trilogies and saga. 

Now, here, we're down to the latest trilogy, which I admit was the least I fully understand among the saga, the very reason why we had the conversation that he is now continuing while am taking a bath, boy, I never thought he would be this hooked. 

"Dapat kasi may panuorin muna bago yan para maintindihan natin lalo. Parang ang layo ng laktaw." I suggest. He continued to tell the background story of Rey. "Tapusin ko lang paliligo ko. Mamaya na." he continued speaking as he walks away from the bathroom door.

I smiled and laughed. I realized he is so into it already. Maybe more than I was or I'll ever be. Because I wouldn't be so eager to talk about it with someone inside the bathroom. I would wait.

"Maganda pala 'to. 'Di ko 'to naappreciate dati." he, too, said these words I said when he told me to watch Spiderman, his favorite.

And that, maybe, is one of the things that would never be taken for granted in marriage. Bringing in your different world to combine. Not going in to his world or him to yours but combining your both worlds together. 

I maybe too early to give marriage advices but isn't the honeymoon stage is the sweetest? So am writing this also for myself in the future. Maybe I'll need it. Maybe we'll need this.

I wanted to remember that though he is Spiderman and I'm a Skywalker, we both love our worlds together and that it's perfect!

Remarkable Scene: Stuck In Love

I have no idea what this film is all bout. I just saw one of its scenes on twitter and then decided to download the film and probably watch it someday.

And that someday happens to be an hour later. And it is one of the awesome films I've watched. I'm glad I am following a page on twitter, which features scenes from wonderful movies. :D

I was kinda laughing when I learned that this film is about a family of writers struggling in their own personal life as writers and as a human. I can relate to some of the scenes and characters of this film. And below were those I considered remarkable in this film:

1.

Daughter: You're a well respected novelist. You won a &*^*&^((&&** twice. You can't behave like that.
Dad: She's coming back.
Daughter: At least tell me you've been writing.
Dad: (unable to answer)
Daughter: Look what you've let her do to you Dad! Seriously!

2.

Brother: You've never been in love?
Sister: If love is setting up a table for a person who's never coming home. I think I'll pass.

3.

Dad: A writer is a sum of their experiences. Go get some.

4.

(in front of aspiring writers)

Dad: The reason why Leslie could never get me up here to talk about the process of writing is... I'm not sure of what to say about that could benefit you. And I still find it all very mysterious years after I wrote my first book. And I'm not sure what it is that compels a person to continue to play make believe even after they're an adult. 

5.

Husband: Here's a confession: I'm not a great writer. I'm a great re-writer. I haven't written anything since you left. 

Ex-wife: You are a great writer. Don't waste all your imaginations on me.

And I have to admit that (again -_-) this film made me cry but I'm not going to tell you which part. You have to experience it yourself. :D

Remarkable Scene: Little Miss Sunshine

I was following a page in twitter (I don't know if 'page' is the term, but I know almost everybody has Facebook so probably you'll get what I mean ;P) which features movie lines and quotes. And then,  one of their posts caught my attention or probably moved me in some ways. So, I look at the description to see the title of the movie and it says, "Little Miss Sunshine". I immediately, watched its trailer and then decided to download the whole film.

I was not expecting too much from the film, but then as the movie began playing, I was literally hooked on it already.

Here are some of the remarkable scenes that are worth sharing because they remind us of the reality of life and the lessons to get through it. It gave me the idea that it's alright if reality beaten and bitten you hard; 'life's a bitch' that's what they say and you gotta be bitchier than it together with your family or friend and don't forget God, please. :D

These scenes below were not in chronological order though.


1. Dad talking to his son who just failed a business deal. What made it heartwarming was connected to their personality. So, find out what personalities they have. :P You will have a hint as you continue to read this blog. :D

2. Of course, everyone of us needs to be reminded of this.

3. Yeah, it is remarkable because I can relate to the old man. :p 

4. This is what apathy looks like. -_-

5. You'll find out why I considered this remarkable when you watch the film. The first line was from the Mom.

6. Reality bites, indeed.

7. Don't listen to the standard of media when it comes to beauty. ;)

8. We all been here.

9. Because sufferings mold, shape and make a better version of us.

Now the list below were the remarkable scenes that made me cry. Literally cried the hell out of me.

1. Yes, that very moment.

2. (T.T) (T.T) (T.T)....

3. Mother knows best. :)

4. You'll know why it's part of this list when you watch the film. :p

So, there you go. I hope I didn't spoil the movie for you. ;P