booXthatleaveamarkMIBF2024 Entry

The very reason why I find old preloved books so alluring and irresistible to buy is not just because they are way cheaper but rather, they surprise you in so many ways that you will feel good about yourself for spending so little yet you acquired treasure in return. One thing that buying pricey new books cannot give you, or at least for me. Not to mention that old books smell better. 😁

But, perhaps, one major factor that led me to prefer preloved books than buying new ones, is that I grew up reading incredible short stories for free. Where else? At school.

Reading heartwarming short stories at a very young age, inspired me to write my own too. "Perhaps, I can also make people feel emotion, particularly sadness, with the stories I write", I told myself during elementary days.

Sad stories make people realize more in life, or so I thought back then. Perhaps, because, most short stories featured in our reading books have sad endings and I was greatly influenced by them. Actually, I forgot their titles but I still know their sad endings and how it made me feel hurt and do better in life to avoid their endings.

Moving up to High School, oh my, the novels have much more depressing storylines 😅. From Ibong Adarna to Florante at Laura to Rizal's. Name it! How do you want to feel hurt? High School mandatory novels have different ways to do so. And then, there I was creating sad poems and short stories because they stir up something in the readers' heart. People make a move when they get hurt. Whatever it is I wanted to fuel the movement.

College came, I was more exposed to literature. The Iliad, Shakespeare's, and the Greek Myth were some of the storyline that amazed me (even until now). Well, because I was brought up to love sad stories anyway.

Yet still, I didn't spend a peso to read all of them.

And the first time I did. It was around P500 or P800 (I already forgot). It was because of the hype. And I thought I'm going to be reading a very good novel. I will not name the title and the author, but it was a famous filipino writer who conducts free script writing training/workshop. And I was dismayed. Well, maybe it was just me, because this writer is famous nationwide and he has existing fandom. I felt bad for the money I spent.

And then, I met stories of Bob Ong. Now this man (presumably) really moved me not just to write but to become a writer myself. And this is the first author that made me save money to buy his books. But I must admit, I have read most of his books by borrowing friends'.

Anyway, why do I tell all of this? (And I hope you're still reading this entry 😅) because I want to make a point that, we might not realize it, but every book and story we read plays a vital role into becoming or shaping who we are as time goes by. All of the books and stories we had read had left a mark on our soul. Some subtle, some are obvious, some you don't even realize but it's there, somewhere.

I love the touch of sunlight on my skin perhaps because of the stories of the Aetas I read on childhood who were bullied because of their skin color and made me realized that it's not nice to bully and having dark skin is not something to be ashamed of.

I chose and married the love of my life because I became wiser by reading tragic love stories and chose to learn from them. (But mostly because I am sure he is the one, so unless you're sure, don't.)

I am how I behave and think today because somehow, partly, it's because of Bob Ong's Macarthur. And perhaps, his writings had greatly influenced my own style in writing. Also he had me looking for other Filipino authors who have skills in writing stories that make people feel and move... and led me hoping to be one of them.

But this time, after reading all the books that left a mark on me in different ways, I don't want to write sad and depressing stories anymore. Rather, I want to make stories that aid people to write their own survival story or at least lead them into survival. Darkness is a scary place, I'd like to provide a torch. Just like how I found one when I needed it the most.

P. S. I still won't buy pricey new books, so joining this gives me a pass to enjoy them without spending a dime, presumably I got picked as one of the winners 😅

#booXthatleaveamarkMIBF2024 entry

(Two years later commentary: Olats 'tu. Pero nireread ko, ayos naman for posting dito sa blog site ko. Naguluhan siguro yung jury kung ano yung books that leave a mark. O malabo at puro kwento na ginawa ko.)